Adult SMS

  • A couple wanted katna(Circumcision)of their son,but they dont know proper word to print,so they printed the wording :THE CUTTING CEREMONY OF FUCKING INSTRUMENTS:

  • AT 18 a lady is like a football, 22 men behind her, at 28 a basketball, 10 men behind her, at 38 a golf ball, 1 man behind her, at 48 a TT ball, 1 man pushing her to the other

  • A Train is bout2 crash. A frantic virgin strips off n says: '' Can anyone make me feel like a woman b4 I die?'' So a man takes off his clothes n say,''Iron these!''

  • A woman goes 2 a dentist 4 tooth extraction doc tells her 2 lie down and gets ready with tools lady lifts her skirt,doc says im not a gynacologist im dentist she says i want to get my hubbys tooth

  • Mother to Teenage Daughter : "I think its time that we should talk about SEX." Daughter : "Yes Mom, What do You want to know ?".

  • what's common between the SUN & WOMEN'S UNDERWEAR? 1) both are hott 2) both look better while going down 3) both disappear by night............

  • Maid cleaning bedroom found a used condom and kept looking at it. Madam asked dont you have sex in the village, Maid "Yes we do but not till the skin drops off.

  • who is stronger man or woman? Anser? A woman coz she lifts two mountain on her chest while man lifts his crane with the help of 2 stones.

  • A daughter sends a telegram to her father on her clearing B.Ed exams,whichthe father receives as:"father, your daughter has been successful in BED."

  • A young man asked a priest......... Father!Is it a sin to sleep with a girl?.... Priest!N my child....But problem is that u guys never SLEEP....

  • i want to fuck u from day to late night so that u get pragnant.and i will kill ur child so that i got lot of money from insurance policy of ur child

  • What a bad day 4 elisa! her mom & dad went out 2 a church so she decided 2 invite her boyfriend Dipopo 2 come with his friend Khali bcoz she's left alone @ home.The 2 arrived in time, her parents came

  • A priest saw a girl removing her blouse. The priest prayed: God, please close my eyes. When he opened his eyes, the girl was naked This time he prayed God please close your eyes.

  • Difference b/w panties of 1970 & 2000 :- In the 70's you had to pull down panties to see the buttocks,In 2000, you have to seperate the buttocks to see the panties

  • A story with moral My girlfriend called me to her house one day. I went there & found her sister alone in the house. She was unbelievably sexythan my GF. She whispered in my ear, "I have feelings for you, make love to me once" I turned around & walked to thefront door towards my car. Amazingly I found my GF standing there & she hugged me & said, "U have won my trust." Moral: Its always better to keep the CuNDuMS in the car & not in the wallet!!

  • A little girl to her mother: "Mom! i have come to know the boy next door have a pennes like a peanut" Mom: " Do you mean its little" girl: " No Mom! Its salty."

  • Husband:"Darling years ago u had a figure like a Coke bottle." Wife:"Yes darling I still do but the only difference is earlier it was300ml and now it's 1.5 liter

  • 75yrz old man got married with a girl of 15 yrz old. At marriage nite they both r crying cuz Girl don't know anything and an old man hav 4gotten evrythng.

  • A husband was stung by a bee on his penis and it became swollen. His wife prayed, "Oh God may you remove off the pain and leave the size as it is....

  • Maid cleaning bedroom found a used condom and kept looking at it. Madam asked dont you have sex in the village, Maid "Yes we do but not till the skin drops off.

  • Mukesh sais to Anil Ambani:"I wnt to kiss ur wife". Anil replied: "Ok but 40paisa per min" anil wife shouted "don't cheat him. Reliance to reliance free.

  • make ur luv to galfrnd on valentine day she will tell u a gud news on mothers day then u will hav a child on childrens day dont try this on everyone u will hav a bad news on 1 dec(aids day)

  • Girl to Mom: "Is it true that Babies come out from the same place where Boys put their P---S?" Mom: "Yes" Girl: "Wow! My Baby will come out from my mouth"

  • A Nurse come in Doc's Room. Docs Asks: Why is ur one Boob out of ur Shirt? Nurse ans: Oh! These medical students never keep the things at place after use.

  • Man: please give me black colour condom shopkeeper:why black colour condom???? man:my friend's dead so i want to share the sadness with his wife tomorrow night love_ever